Wednesday, July 11, 2007

the Tour de France makes me sleepy

here we go again with the Tour-induced sleep deprivation. we tape (yeah, like VCR-tape. old skool) the morning coverage with phil liggett and paul sherwen because i can't take the prime-time commentary (sorry bobke, but your long-winded, perplexing metaphors drive me batty, and i know more about cycling than your sidekick). and though we can skip the adverts and boring parts, stopping for the mid-course sprint bonuses and crashes, i still lose another hour of sleep a night.

but it's worth it. yesterday the 4-man breakaway was caught right before the line; for a while it seemed the sprinters' teams had waited too long and the break would have its day, but no. there was mass confusion leading up to the finish, though -- nothing like the old days of team saeco, when the entire team would line at the front and stretch the pack single-file, then peel off one-by-one until they launched cipollini at 50mph for another stage win.

nothing like that. instead, out of the mass confusion emerged, of all things, the yellow jersey of the tour leader, fabian cancellara, who took the lead in the prologue time trial on day 1. dude is NOT a sprinter and as the maillot jaune has all the excuse in the world to sit pretty in the pack protected by his posse, but instead he busted out a stage win yesterday by going off the front and skunking all the sprinters. (sorry robbie.) does this give you goosebumps, or what:

maybe the 2007 tour won't totally suck after all.


fatmammycat said...

I saw the elevation chart for the worlds, it made my bottom hurty.

finn said...

i've had the runs all day. dunno whether it's race fright or stage fright, as it's Performing Monkey time in 1hr and counting.

wish i could just fling my monkeyshit on the wall and walk out of the room but then i wouldn't be able to buy the next big apple thingie. fuuuuuuuckl.

i'd rather be riding my bike right now.

isn't your 5-miler this weekend?

fatmammycat said...

Yep. Should be a doddle though, assuming I can feel my legs by then. Those sodding weighted lunges are the devil's smegma.

fatmammycat said...

I too had preforming monkey day, so I pity and empathise like a fox. Just use spirit fingers a lot, folk like that kind of thing.

finn said...

*lifting* in general is the devil's smegma. i dont know how you do it, but i respect your dedication.

what are "spirit fingers"? i did explain that "fuzzy magic" was part of our methodology; is that sort of the same thing??

i need a drink, and a nap. my brain is pudding.

fatmammycat said...

I like lifting, what I don't like is knowing I'm doing something wrong, and aching like a cunt the next day, it's annoying. That said I've just toddled back from a wet 5 miler and now I feel much better-even if it did almost take me a mile to stop wincing.
Spirit fingers, Dahling Gell, is a very distinctive waggling motion deployed the world over by spoofers, charlatons, cheerleaders and folk who like to give the impression they supermegareally know what they're talking about (me).
A truly good spoofer will have spirit fingers so mesmerizing that you wind up giving him or her a payrise and paid leave without even understanding why. I aspire to such waggling. I want to be a spirit finger master.
Also I replied to your clit problem, I think I nailed it, not literally, that would hurt.