Thursday, October 11, 2007

how to be a bad catholic

i forgot my grandmother's 87th birthday. lesson learned: iCal cannot remind you about events you do not enter in the first place. not so user-centric are ya now, apple.

but my mom remembered.
- oh finn it was so sad. i wished her happy birthday but there was no connect.
- no connect? she doesn't know when her birthday is?
- she doesn't know what *a* birthday is. i gave her a card, but a card means nothing unless you open it for her and read it out loud. i gave her a soft pink turtleneck and purposely didn't put it in a box because i knew she couldn't deal with opening a box so i put it in a gift bag with tissue paper on top and she still didn't know what to do.
- wellllll, pink was a good choice.
grandmother always liked pink, and purple. likes. she LIKES pink & purple. when she painted, she would pause and cock her head, then pronounce needs more purple and dabble in the plums and violets.

- i thought she'd connect if we sang. so i said 'let's sing the birthday song because it's your birthday.' she sang the birthday song but didn't know she should put her own name in. she doesn't know what her birthday means. she doesn't have a clue. and weird sister sent flowers, but grandmother didn't understand. it's her birthday, she gets flowers -- it's too much of a thought process.
- i'm sure you made her happy just being there, with a pink turtleneck.
- it wasn't any special day to her.
- that's okay, mom. just you being there made her happy.

i love my grandmother dearly but a part of me wishes she would go faster simply to spare my mum.


fatmammycat said...

The wind down is always the wort part. It was good of your mother to reach out and try.

addon said...

yes, you do get to a point of wishing it were all over, for everyone's sake.

finn said...

you do, adam, and then you feel guilty.
but not guilty enough to go to church.

at least my gmother still recognises my mom -- a small grace anyway.

btw, in the developing list of Does This Hooch Count If You're Teetotaling Before A Big Race rules, snorting vodka thru your nose DOES count. counts double in fact.

fatmammycat said...

yep, I would agree with that. I would also like to add my doubts over whether pale ale counts as actual hooch. I"m thinking it's more medicinal.

finn said...

medicinal and, if it comes from the same fridge that houses a bag of oranges, or a raisiny grape in the crisper drawer, nutritional as well.

pale ale goes on the list under Doesnt.

fatmammycat said...

How do we feel about cava? Wouldn't that come under fruit in a grape-y kind of way?

finn said...

yes of course. as would prosecco.

i'm afraid that muscatel, though apple-y, Does count. just because it's nasty.

fatmammycat said...

True, it is so minging it's mong, but by my reckoning Limoncello is just an alcohol flavoured ice pop/dessert and not to be considered hooch, I'd bring baileys into this loop too, really...if you think about it.

finn said...

thank you for the wonderful dreams you gave me last night fatcat, visions of sugarplummed liquors dancing in my head.

i did awake with a start at 2:40, sharp realisation a tack in my temple. i meant calvados.