Monday, July 30, 2007

combating post-Tour depression

congrats to adam for his country's (first) podium finish in this year's Tour. it's sad luck that rogers crashed and mcewen seems to flourish only in even years of the Tour -- or else the aussies might have taken 2 spots on the podium and the green jersey.

after riding over 3500km, the top 3 riders finished within half a minute of each other. contador came in at 91 hours and 26sec, evans was 23sec behind, with le
ipheimer only another 8sec back. crazy.

oh, the evenings will be bleak without "the boys" as my mom refers to paul sherwen and phil liggett. enter PTD: Post-Tour Depression, a serious affliction of cyclists and sport aficionados who in the past 3 weeks have grown dependent upon tour coverage for the excitement of the sprints and crashes, the gorgeous scenery, the clash of titans in the mountains and the promise of daft europeans running alongside the peleton wearing antlers, g-strings, borat underwear or simply nothing at all.

to fight PTD over the next weeks, i provide the following suggestions. if you don't need them yourself maybe you know someone who does.

Suggestions for Recovering from the Tour
-- ride your bike.
-- ride your bike with people with whom you can rehash in gritty detail every seminal event in the tour. don't try this with your coworkers. you've already hammered and killed what little patience they had.
-- trip through phil's and paul's audio blogs.
-- watch taped versions of the stages you missed, or want to see again. this strategy should be employed judiciously, as it may lead to even more Tour dependence. if you're still watching archives in september, we'll need to talk.
-- hit up google image search. here's a start: the pocket rocket, boonen, and for the guys: podium girls (kinda slim pickins so here's PezCycling News's distractions de tour).
-- learn to (or perfect your current) streak effectively so that maybe in 2008 YOU can run up an alp or two alongside the peleton and get on television. here a clever gentleman demonstrates the tear-away suit he designed for optimal streaking. or perhaps you'd like to be more artful and unique, like the individual below who should be commended for his creative use of Sexy Chicken.
-- write letters to Versus to thank them for their round-the-clock tour coverage. tell them trautwig doesn't suck as much as he used to, but if paul and phil ever kick the bucket far better they be propped up like that guy in Weekend at Bernies than turn the show over to trautwig and bob roll. tell them too that their new name is gay. Versus vs. OLN? gay gay gay.
-- ride your bike even more.

hope that helps.

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