bad news & good, from dr foot

dr foot proactively quashed all my protests and denials by kicking off yesterday's appointment with a display of my MRI results. kinda hard to deny in black & white. that's the 3rd metatarsal, the bone that runs from the middle toe to the ankle.



flanked by his technician and a doctor-in-training, dr foot put me up on the table to assess the damage. his fingers poked into soft tissue crevices, tested my peroneal strength and then pressed along the bone where the MRI indicated the fracture. tech and junior leaned in. there was a collective holding of breaths. dr foot looked at me questioningly.
- hurt?
- it's a little sore. but it's sore there on my other foot too.
- it's a deep fracture - dr foot noted. i might not be able to reach it with my fingers.
he hummed softly to himself while rummaging in his pocket. i winced when the tuning fork emerged. he struck it on the side of the table and i started doing kegel exercises. 3 pairs of eyes stared at my face while the fork touched down. i didn't have to say a word.
- no pain on the fourth metatarsal - he observed.
my upper lip twitched when he moved the fork. oh jesusfuck.
- and third...
nothing. no jolt, no jism of pain. the tech looked dumbfounded. dr foot completed some desultory poking and then cleared me for "training as tolerable": pref 2 more weeks of rest, and then slow return to mileage with a bone stimulator unit thrown in.
- so i can run on a stress fracture?? and it'll still heal?
- yep, as long as you don't do anything stupid. the bone stimulator will help, of course.
- what causes a stress fracture in that area?
- tight calves, tight shoes and broken-down orthotics. we'll make some minor tweaks to your orthotics today, but nothing major until your season's done in october... he sailed out the exam room with junior and his cheerful voice faded down the hallway - or earlier if you wrack yourself!

the tech gathered my files, frowning as she pulled the MRI printout off the viewer.
- i can't believe you don't feel more pain when it's that broke.

laf wasn't surprised.
- you have a high pain threshold. kel ran on her stress fracture 'til her bone was mush. so are you doing the half-ironman sunday?
- hell no!!
- good girl.

so look out grandpa-on-his-way-to-the-library. i'll be gunning for you this weekend.