Pyramid in Your Pants

friday's Happiness lasted approx 8 hours, or until dr foot called to say my x-ray and MRI reveal a stress fracture. before confining me to Das Boot for 4-6weeks he wants to see me tomorrow so he can confirm. know how you confirm a stress fracture? (you learn a lot when you are injured.) you ring a standard-issue tuning fork and apply it to the bone-in-question.
- if there's a fracture, you'll light up like a christmas tree! - dr foot tittered - and when i press down on it with my finger you might pass out.
- you sound like a great date - i said sullenly.

it's JUNE motherfucker. i've raced TWICE this season, NO victories, when this time last year i had about 8 races under my belt and i think i was winning things. i am frustrated and chafing and so full of testosterone i keep checking to see if i've grown a penis but nothing yet. yesterday it was so bad that even though i should have been riding easy, i chased down a skinny old man riding his cruiser bike down valley road. i'm sure grandpa was really impressed and after he got to the library and unpacked his panniers i bet he told the people behind the Returns desk how he got passed on his way there by a girl (i think it was a girl). yes i'm sure that's how it went down.

oh penisshitfuckcunt. i need to not have a stress fracture.